I was a student in the junior college branch of Buxi Jagabandhu Bidyadhar College, Bhubaneshwar. It is a very good and famous college in Odisha. Fortunately, I got a seat in this institution & also another seat in the college hostel for Junior students(class 11/12). Two years went like a bullet train and soon class 12 finals arrived. I scored 80% in finals, messed up every entrance I appeared in that year 2017.
I dropped for the year 2017–18.
Many people think the life of a dropper is heaven. A dropper can stay at home, sleep as much as he wants and eat mom's food, watch TV, play with siblings, going out at night with friends etc etc.
But for your surprise, dropper life is very hard and mentally frustrating in Indian society, especially for those droppers, who drop because they have failed in “some exams ”.
That “some exam ” in my case was JEE. As many of you know, JEE is the toughest exam in undergraduate level in science and technology stream.
When I had decided to drop a year for JEE preparations, my parents were against it. In fact, they started to taunt me. My father used to tell me that I am not able to do anything as I am an idiot. I will never qualify JEE. Well, that is the general thinking of Indian parents. When their child drops a year, they get furious, as the society is going to question them every now and then.
I did not listen to my parents for the first time in my life and started preparing for JEE. I used to get up at 4.30 AM in the morning and sleep at 10.00 PM every day. There was a lot to complete and only 10 months were left for JEE 2018. The first month was very tough as parents were forcing me to join some B.Sc. courses in a local government college. I had a zero interest in doing B.Sc., so I ignored them.
I had to ignore my relatives, friends, family functions and many things that I used to do. I did not leave my hobbies but I was not able to do them regularly. Life was like a well-oiled machine, framed for something serious. I was just going and going forward, without knowing what will happen next. The 6 months went like this.
After 6 months I had started practising questions for JEE. For the first time, I had opened previous years papers and to my surprise, they were pretty complex and hard. In the last 6 months I had prepared all the chapters for JEE but not up to JEE level. I had to give more emphasis on problem-solving. I solved a lot of problems of my own, got many doubts. As I was a self-study student, I had no one who can clear my doubts, neither I had any guide who can direct me the correct path. JEE problems were very complex and the doubts in those questions used to take a lot of time to be solved. I had to invest my free time also, to solve my own doubts. The only hope at that time was the internet and in 2017, there were not so many websites available to clear doubts from the internet. I remember I used to google the question and either ask it in Yahoo question answer or in Stack exchange website. Every day, I used to list out my doubts and in the evening I used to solve them till 9.00 PM.
Soon my mock tests were started. My performance was not so good. But still, I did not lose my patience neither I tried to quit preparation. I knew that the only solution to my situation is to go slow and go forward.
In April, JEE-2018 happened. I got cut from the list by 3 marks. The qualifying mark for general category students in that year was 74 and I scored 71. I was sad. My whole year preparation went like a flow, for only 3 marks. I tried the ISI Mathematics exam that year, again got cut from the list by 5 marks, only 5 marks. I qualified CUCET-2018 and I was called for the counselling for I.M.Sc. courses in CUTND. But as I have told before, I was not at all interested for B.Sc. or M.Sc., so I ignored the offer.
When in an Indian middle-class family, a kid denies a college offer, the atmosphere turns like detonating an atomic bomb. The exactly the same thing happened in my home. Parents were angry, denying again, taunting again. They were reminding me about my wrong discussion in 2017 to drop a year.
I took a break for 7 days. Not a travel or tour break, but for a discussion break. At that situation in life, one should list out the remaining options.
I listed out the remaining options. I had two options at that time.
1 - Study B.Sc./B.A./B.Com and curse the total life till the end of life. As I had no interest in B.Sc, so it would be cursing for me.
2 - Take a risk, drop one year again and qualify JEE. But this time no JEE advanced option, I mean the door of IIT is closed.
Like most of the Indian parents, my parents suggested me to choose point number 1.
Unlike most of the 18 years old kid, I choose the second one. Not because of a fancy college or JEE but because I have an interest in technology. I wanted to be an engineer.
Again the taunting started. This time my mother was furious. Father was reminding me of my failure every now and then. Both of them were hesitant.
This time I was emphasizing more on problem-solving. Unlike 2017,2018 was not a very good year for me. Almost every day I had to hear taunts of my parents. Every Indian parent have this problem. They don't understand the child's mental condition. If the child is not doing something that is good according to their opinion, then they think he has no future and he knows nothing. As my parents are the same Indians, how could I get rid of this? JEE was creating a lot of mental tensions already and in addition to it my parents were in a cold war with me against my discussions.
I was doing well gradually. There was not a single day in the last 2 years when I did not learn or practise. I used to get caught by viral fever, but still, I used to study. One thing was clear in my mind, that neither my parents not someone else are going to walk with me on this path. I was alone on my way, but I was growing up daily.
Soon CBSE decided to handover the exam to NTA and it was declared that JEE would be held two times a year.
I had my focus on the January attempt 2019. I practised hard, tried to attain my best. JEE(January) happened, and this time I was not disappointed. After the exam, I was pretty sure that I am qualifying the exam. But I also knew that I can improve my performance. After JEE January I had put all my focus on JEE April.
JEE January result was coming. I had scored 92.67 percentile. Not so good percentile, but sufficient enough to get me a good engineering college in state or newly opened NITs. I had proved some people wrong those who used to say that I can not qualify the exam.
JEE April was held from 8th-12th April 2019. I had done my best and I was expecting a better percentile this time. I had scored 96 percentile with the mark 200+/360.
Ways To Contact Me:-
I dropped for the year 2017–18.
Many people think the life of a dropper is heaven. A dropper can stay at home, sleep as much as he wants and eat mom's food, watch TV, play with siblings, going out at night with friends etc etc.
But for your surprise, dropper life is very hard and mentally frustrating in Indian society, especially for those droppers, who drop because they have failed in “some exams ”.
That “some exam ” in my case was JEE. As many of you know, JEE is the toughest exam in undergraduate level in science and technology stream.
When I had decided to drop a year for JEE preparations, my parents were against it. In fact, they started to taunt me. My father used to tell me that I am not able to do anything as I am an idiot. I will never qualify JEE. Well, that is the general thinking of Indian parents. When their child drops a year, they get furious, as the society is going to question them every now and then.
I did not listen to my parents for the first time in my life and started preparing for JEE. I used to get up at 4.30 AM in the morning and sleep at 10.00 PM every day. There was a lot to complete and only 10 months were left for JEE 2018. The first month was very tough as parents were forcing me to join some B.Sc. courses in a local government college. I had a zero interest in doing B.Sc., so I ignored them.
I had to ignore my relatives, friends, family functions and many things that I used to do. I did not leave my hobbies but I was not able to do them regularly. Life was like a well-oiled machine, framed for something serious. I was just going and going forward, without knowing what will happen next. The 6 months went like this.
After 6 months I had started practising questions for JEE. For the first time, I had opened previous years papers and to my surprise, they were pretty complex and hard. In the last 6 months I had prepared all the chapters for JEE but not up to JEE level. I had to give more emphasis on problem-solving. I solved a lot of problems of my own, got many doubts. As I was a self-study student, I had no one who can clear my doubts, neither I had any guide who can direct me the correct path. JEE problems were very complex and the doubts in those questions used to take a lot of time to be solved. I had to invest my free time also, to solve my own doubts. The only hope at that time was the internet and in 2017, there were not so many websites available to clear doubts from the internet. I remember I used to google the question and either ask it in Yahoo question answer or in Stack exchange website. Every day, I used to list out my doubts and in the evening I used to solve them till 9.00 PM.
Soon my mock tests were started. My performance was not so good. But still, I did not lose my patience neither I tried to quit preparation. I knew that the only solution to my situation is to go slow and go forward.
In April, JEE-2018 happened. I got cut from the list by 3 marks. The qualifying mark for general category students in that year was 74 and I scored 71. I was sad. My whole year preparation went like a flow, for only 3 marks. I tried the ISI Mathematics exam that year, again got cut from the list by 5 marks, only 5 marks. I qualified CUCET-2018 and I was called for the counselling for I.M.Sc. courses in CUTND. But as I have told before, I was not at all interested for B.Sc. or M.Sc., so I ignored the offer.
When in an Indian middle-class family, a kid denies a college offer, the atmosphere turns like detonating an atomic bomb. The exactly the same thing happened in my home. Parents were angry, denying again, taunting again. They were reminding me about my wrong discussion in 2017 to drop a year.
I took a break for 7 days. Not a travel or tour break, but for a discussion break. At that situation in life, one should list out the remaining options.
I listed out the remaining options. I had two options at that time.
1 - Study B.Sc./B.A./B.Com and curse the total life till the end of life. As I had no interest in B.Sc, so it would be cursing for me.
2 - Take a risk, drop one year again and qualify JEE. But this time no JEE advanced option, I mean the door of IIT is closed.
Like most of the Indian parents, my parents suggested me to choose point number 1.
Unlike most of the 18 years old kid, I choose the second one. Not because of a fancy college or JEE but because I have an interest in technology. I wanted to be an engineer.
Again the taunting started. This time my mother was furious. Father was reminding me of my failure every now and then. Both of them were hesitant.
This time I was emphasizing more on problem-solving. Unlike 2017,2018 was not a very good year for me. Almost every day I had to hear taunts of my parents. Every Indian parent have this problem. They don't understand the child's mental condition. If the child is not doing something that is good according to their opinion, then they think he has no future and he knows nothing. As my parents are the same Indians, how could I get rid of this? JEE was creating a lot of mental tensions already and in addition to it my parents were in a cold war with me against my discussions.
I was doing well gradually. There was not a single day in the last 2 years when I did not learn or practise. I used to get caught by viral fever, but still, I used to study. One thing was clear in my mind, that neither my parents not someone else are going to walk with me on this path. I was alone on my way, but I was growing up daily.
Soon CBSE decided to handover the exam to NTA and it was declared that JEE would be held two times a year.
I had my focus on the January attempt 2019. I practised hard, tried to attain my best. JEE(January) happened, and this time I was not disappointed. After the exam, I was pretty sure that I am qualifying the exam. But I also knew that I can improve my performance. After JEE January I had put all my focus on JEE April.
JEE January result was coming. I had scored 92.67 percentile. Not so good percentile, but sufficient enough to get me a good engineering college in state or newly opened NITs. I had proved some people wrong those who used to say that I can not qualify the exam.
JEE April was held from 8th-12th April 2019. I had done my best and I was expecting a better percentile this time. I had scored 96 percentile with the mark 200+/360.
"My life as a dropper was very busy,mentally frustrating,full of failures and disappointments but still, I learned many lessons for life. Failures made me strong,strong enough to do anything and do everything in future. I learned the golden way to spend time alone,walk alone and grow alone. I have full control of my mind now,which I did not have in 2017."I am not someone who has achieved something so great. I have my life, which is called as dropper's life.
Ways To Contact Me:-
- Through Quora message box and Quora answers.
- Through the official e-mail of dropper's den, dropperden2019@gmail.com .
- Through the "DISCUSSION" page in my blog.